Home > Barack Obama, Comedy, conspiracy, Democrats, Down Syndrome, Drugs, Film, Funny, John McCain, Movies, Politics, Republicans, stand up > The Republican party is now stealing Hollywood scripts….

The Republican party is now stealing Hollywood scripts….

September 3, 2008, @ 9:59 am Leave a comment Go to comments

I can blame my encyclopedic knowledge of obscure and horrid 80’s films for realizing the frightening truth of this conspiracy,….   my spouse feels a ‘dream job’ for me would be a ‘Beer Master/Film Critic’….

Over the course of the last few days, as Sarah Palin’s life has become the ‘open book’ that is American Politics….  I’m sure Jefferson, Washington and Adams would be thrilled with our progress….   In that we can smear ALL people much more efficiently now…

As a father of a kid with Down Syndrome I don’t much sympathize for her…  She’s chosen her career over a kid that needs extra care from the people who love him the most, my wife and I readjusted our lives and changed careers so we could have more flexibility to provide for him…  We didn’t expect it, but we’ve become a better family for it…

So her other kid’s pregnancy I can also relate to as that happened to me as well, I’m sorry for the daughter, I’m sorry for the boyfriend, the kid’s a hockey player, who’s getting a ‘shotgun wedding‘ (though his myspace page was great, as he was honest in saying he didn’t want a kid and of course they made him take it down, but I’m sure you could Google a story on it)…

So hearing all this I’m thinking “You know, the Republican party REALLY IS the traditional party.”…  I mean I haven’t seen a good forced marriage since I was in hillbilly country (southern Indiana, N. Kentucky)…  I mean I’ve had ‘corn squeezin’s‘ before, it’s great stuff too, once your vision comes back…

Some of my family’s most dysfunctional situations started out JUST like those kid’s so GOD BLESS EM  I say…  There aren’t ENOUGH angry young parents out there to beat their kid’s now a day’s right?

I’m also listening and it hits me…  This WHOLE THING is the script from one of Rob Lowe’s FINEST films of the 80’s ‘Youngblood‘, which also stars Cynthia Gibb, so YOU KNOW IT’s gotta be great…  Actually, I believe she is topless in this one so it may be worth viewing again on fast forward…  But that’s beside the point…

So now I’ve realized the DEPTH of the Republinazi’s conspiracy…  Spread the word people…  Keep your eye’s out in the news for upcoming sure fire moments from the Republican party…

I heard a woman on the news from Minnesota (don’t cha know)…  Talking about how she likes Palin cause she’s ‘entertaining’…  Great, this stupid bitch is going to vote for McCain cause she feel’s it’s the party that’s gonna give her more ‘Desperate Housewives‘ moments when she watches the news…  What the hell is wrong with the other citizens in my county???

It’s like they’ve (the RNC) directly lifted the passage from ‘The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy‘….  “The president’s REAL job is to distract people from where the REAL power lie”…. I’m paraphrasing of course, but it’s true here too SUCH an extreme and it’s like no one else is paying attention because it’s SCIENCE fiction…  If fucking Danielle Steele had written it there would be 55 million screaming housewives hanging effigies of McCain in the streets…

So remember keep looking for future moments out of the RNC from your favorite 80’s show’s and movies:

You’ll be seeing the ‘don’t do drugs’ episode of ‘Family Ties‘ or anything starring Kirk Cameron, though I gotta admit he PROBABLY signed over the rights to the RNC…

There will HAVE to be everyone’s FAVORITE ‘rock out’ montage moment from Sixteen Candles, Pretty in Pink Revenge of the Nerds or The Breakfast Club

Look for John McCain, in silhouette, dancing his way through a barn and around dangerous farming implements ala Kevin Bacon in ‘Footloose‘….  By the way, it’s NOT REALLY McCain in the long shot’s, I just want to let you folks down in advance…

I’d say the RNC has ‘jumped the shark’ but jump the shark jumped the shark when they became popular right???

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  1. September 4, 2008, @ 6:39 pm at 6:39 pm

    If you’ve lived in a small town like the one Sarah Palin was mayor of then you know you can’t go poo without everyone else knowing what color it is…

    Check out the letter after this article from someone that has been ‘mayored’ by Sarah Palin and has known her since 1992: http://www.washingtonindependent.com/3671/the-reform-candidate

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