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Cheaters and the cheating cheaters that let them cheat…

May 8, 2011, @ 6:51 pm Leave a comment

Obama’s choices have revealed his genius, Hillary makes perfect sense now. Who better to help us get over Pakistan cheating on us all along.

The President knew Osama was in Pakistan all the way back in 2006. He’s been around, he knows when a brothers cheating.

Pakistan needs to be careful, we have a female Sec. of State. If they push her too far she’ll drive all the way over there in a diaper for retribution.

I’ve gotta admit it would be fun seeing Hillary try to take down Pakistan with a roofie in the airport parking garage like Dexter though.

I’m tired of making excuses for the Governator….

April 4, 2009, @ 11:05 am Leave a comment

The family and I call him the Governator, but I don’t think we’re alone in that… Believe me I won’t be voting for him! Friends from other states keep commenting to me on how he’s messing up California…

It’s really pretty sad when your state’s Governor brings his ‘Conan’ sword into a state budget meeting cause he thinks that will help him ‘get the people on his side’….

Now if he’d of started actually SWINGING a sharpened scimitar about a budget meeting, then MAYBE he’d get my vote…

It kind of depends on how many Republicans he takes out of ‘public service’…  I mean there is a budget crisis so less payroll is less payroll…

4 more years of ‘GOP’ politics are not needed here….

September 24, 2008, @ 10:19 am 3 comments

Don’t worry about the economy folks…  W. is planning to talk to us all soon to ‘allay’ our fears… I feel SO MUCH BETTER NOW!!!

Here is a man that is so stupid he led a national economy that was at a SURPLUS (for those of you who don’t realize it that means the government had MORE THAN THEY WERE SPENDING!!!) and turned it into one of the largest DEFICITS (for those same folks, this is a BAD THING!!!) this nation has ever seen…  And it’s not like he did it by himself, he’s too stupid, every business he ever ran he literally RAN INTO THE GROUND and bankrupted it, but he previously did it MUCH QUICKER!!!…  Again, because he’s STUPID…   He can’t pronounce nuclear correctly, well ok he can’t pronounce MANY, MANY words correctly, but that just gives further credence to my argument…

He didn’t do it alone, in that, the GOP is pulling the strings on our current puppet…  Now they want to rush through $700 Billion worth of ’emergency funding’, that’s billion with a B, BEFORE the next president is elected…  This is a ‘hurry up’ scam, YOU CAN’T WAIT, you have to ACT FAST before the chance goes away!!!…  We are bailing out BUSINESSES that are poorly managed by allowing the people who bankrupted them to CONTINUE TO RUN THEM while we pay the bill!!!

And to TOP IT OFF, you will still have to pay those SAME businesses any money OWED TO THEM…  Correct me if I’m wrong but this would mean they are being paid TWICE by the average American citizen….  How is this NOT getting anally raped???…  I just want to know the distinction so I can tell the officer when he’s filling out the report while they do the rape kit on my ass….

Where is the bail out for the American public???…  Why don’t we have the government mandating a 50% reduction in ALL DEBT across the board for ALL the American CITIZENS!!!…  Everything too, not just home loans but credit cards, auto loans, signature loans, check cashing loans….  Then they can pay back those loan companies with ‘tax write offs’ for the value of all those forgiven loans???…..

That way EVERYONE can have something done that will personally effect them and allow them to realize that their government actually gives a damn about them!!!!

This will never happen of course, the people who are making double the money off you would never allow it….  They are the GOP and they LOVE YOU….  At least they LOVE the fact that they can RAPE you and you NEVER ONCE CALLED THE COPS ON THEM!!!…  In fact many of you loved it so much you RE-ELECTED them….

And now many of you are considering allowing the ASS RAPE to continue by voting for McCain and Palin….  An abusive father could never be as proud as the GOP is of you folks who are considering voting this way, takes a lickin’ and keeps on tickin’….  But it’s ok right, cause the GOP REALLY loves you and it didn’t mean it, it just had ‘too much to drink’ last night and it’s having a tough time at work right now…

You see ‘my way’ would have all that money go to the people, ‘their way’ has all that money go to BIG BUSINESS not once, but TWICE….

Yeah, vote the McCain/Palin ticket….   Morons…

Clay Aiken Comes out of the closet…

September 24, 2008, @ 9:35 am 2 comments

You know, I really don’t think the closet this guy was in was too ‘deep’, maybe it was more like a cardboard ‘moving box’….  You know one of those really sturdy ones you can put a metal bar in to hang all your closet stuff when you move (they are VERY helpful), but how is this news???….

Is there anyone out there that is TRULY shocked by the news that Clay Aiken is gay?…  I mean OTHER than his mother and possibly his father, but come on man you HAD to suspect it, and maybe the former fans of Liberace….

These obtuse middle aged women fans are a phenomenon I do not understand….  These are women who will probably all vote for McCain and would consider themselves ‘conservatives’ so they are ‘religiously opposed’ to homosexuality, yet when it comes to entertainment they LOVE to see a guy who is OBVIOUSLY gay perform as long as he doesn’t ‘flaunt it’ in front of them in public by living his life as he wants…

I don’t get it, I mean I’m straight I just don’t get it…  HOW COULD ANYONE NOT HAVE KNOWN???…   I’m not opposed to homosexuality, HELL I live in San Francisco if I was I would have a SERIOUS issue!!!!….

I’m glad that I live in a city where people can be themselves and not have to worry, for the most part, about doing everything all the rest of us enjoy with our partner…  I’d think just being able to hold hands in public and give one another a quick peck on the lips has got to be a hell of a thing to enjoy when you can’t do it in most other places in the world…  No one cares here, it’s not an issue just as it shouldn’t be anywhere, who cares, it’s not like you have to sit there and watch them….  Though that can be HOT too!!!…  Sorry I couldn’t resist the urge to throw in a stupid joke….  But you get my point.

It’s just not news….

Better bettors in a new millenium?… Thank you Fantasy Football…

September 15, 2008, @ 11:03 am 1 comment

I tend to go to Vegas or Reno as it’s nearer, on occasion, as they’re a mecca of decadence and ‘proof in practice’ of the capitalist pig dog system into which I had the good fortune of being born.  I enjoy the rancor and noise as it’s usually going on in MY HEAD anyway so I like to see OTHERS experience it as a physical reality and try to concentrate as I have to on a daily basis.

Though I tend to spend most of my time at the Craps tables, where the smart bettor can make money no matter what way the dice are rolling, but occasionally I’ll go to the Blackjack table too.  In order to lick my wounds and make my money back after falling victim to being near a moron at the Craps table…  You’ve seen them, they shouldn’t be allowed on the floor, it’s like you feel the ice once a cooler rolls into the place.

I have however noticed an improvement when I decide to go to the sports book and bet some games.  Now sports betting is the ONE stupid thing I’ll do at a casino, and it’s ONLY on the NFL…  I never used to bet on it, sports betting is one of the worst odds bets in the world.  No matter how good the team all you need is for a moron like T.O., that’s Terrell Owens not Tom Osborne, to screw it up and blow all the odds off the board by dropping the ball!  I mean it’s like people totally forget that they pay people to just blow the spread, you don’t even have to lose the game, just don’t beat the spread.  Win by 6 instead of 7 or more and a LOT of people don’t win BUT the people who bet AGAINST the spread do.  Does no one remember the Boston College basketball scandals?  Poor Henry Hill, unless he’s on Howard Stern no one remembers him enough to want to whack him…

But the point is that thanks to Fantasy Football, when I do want to bet on football now it’s generally a much quicker experience.  It’s probably helped to save the sports books in Nevada, not just Fantasy Football but Baseball, NHL and even NASCAR.  They all have fantasy leagues, which leads to people knowing alot more about a particular sport just on a general knowledge basis.  It’s just a fact.  Your researching for your free leagues, I know I do it too.  The fact remains however that humans like to put knowledge to USE.  It’s in our ‘nature’ to want to apply that knowledge to good and productive effort.  Beating someone else out of some green seems a natural and healthy way to do so while not just sitting for hours on end in a casino.  See you can bet on sports in the morning before the odds change then go out with the kids to one of the MANY fine places to take the kids in the new “family friendly” Las Vegas…  Yeah, that was a poorly conceived ad campaign.  Vegas is no fun for kids, it’s really not alot of fun for short people in general.  My spouse is well lets just say she’s not tall, ALOT not tall, she’s as short as a woman can be and still get into the U.S. Army…  But it makes me, as an ‘average height’ American male, feel incredibly HUGE.  So that’s what’s important here.

So go to Vegas America, this next Great Depression we’re seeing on the horizon can be stopped from out there in the desert.  All you need is a BIG wad of stinky green cash, a bunch of weed, several cases of poppers, some good mescaline and crushed up ‘No-Doze’ to snort when the Coke runs out, cause ALL THE BOOZE IS FREE WHILE YOUR GAMBLING (this INCLUDES Wild Turkey Rare Breed)!!!

It’s where W plans to put up his Presidential Library as soon as he falls off the wagon.  At least this will be a retirement to see, the public reversion to the slime from whence he came, it’s a good thing Sinatra is dead.  Word on the street is George W. owed him 50K from a night of binging in the old Flamingo back in the late 70’s.  Frank Sr. woulda whacked him and there is nothing 41 coulda done about it.  Cause it’s ‘old school’.

9/11… 7 years, alot has changed….

September 11, 2008, @ 1:11 pm 1 comment

Well this morning started off as usual, then once I had gotten everyone out the door on the way to their respective places in the world I turned to news….  I knew it was today, I just hadn’t planned on getting drawn into a ‘real time’ replay on MSNBC of the morning’s coverage from 9/11/01….

I was working in Orlando at the time, actually it was for a large international private airline company…  They specialized in flying around VIP’s and servicing their aircraft and such…  But I was in my office listening to Howard Stern, then one of the crew from his show came in the studio and said a plane had hit one of the towers…

The kicker is I knew right away in my gut it was a terrorist attack and I knew it was most likely Osama Bin Laden’s organization, I had actually discussed the stupidity of the way the attack on the twin towers was done in 1993 with a car bomb….  I had told a friend that intercontinental domestic flights full of fuel would be the way to go….  Then on THIS morning it happened….  My friend was actually one of the first people to call me cause it freaked him out that I was right, me too a bit…

I mean I don’t know if it’s because I’ve moved around so much in my life, but I’m just able to ‘step out’ and see things from other peoples perspective…  I believe it’s mostly about empathy, not in the ‘Star Trek’ sense I’m not psychic, I can just understand what people are feeling and thinking, or will, be thinking in the future based on previous behavior….   It’s kind of creepy to the people around me, I can tell what your thinking by the look on your face and your body language…

Someone once called me an ‘eideteker’, meaning I have a visually cued memory like people who are eidetic, which is absolutely true, but I hesitate to use that term as most people think a visual memory is like ‘photographic memory’….  I don’t remember specific images in exact detail, I remember patterns and that’s why I can ‘connect the dots’ and see where it’s going quickly…

It’s been an immense help when it comes to raising a son with Down Syndrome, I know what’s bothering him even when he can’t express it, so it’s got it’s bonuses too…  But mostly it creeps people out….  I’ve profiled serial killers based on newspaper and televised reports…  Usually, when they catch them, I find I’m roughly correct in at least 2/3rds of my assessment, sometimes more…  I don’t think that’s half bad considering I’m not seeing most of the case details…

So I heard it on Stern first (about the first plane) and went ahead and told everyone in the office, we all started listening and watching the news….  My wife has alot of family in New York City, her brother actually had an apartment not too far north in lower mid-town Manhattan, so my first thought was of him as he lived closer than anyone else I knew…  He didn’t regularly work in the district, but he did have occasion to be there…  We just hoped he wasn’t there that day and waited to hear back from anyone in the family that heard from him first…  Then several of my wife’s uncles work in the city as well so it was just a really shitty day…  Even after you found out everyone you knew was ok it really didn’t make it feel any better as you knew how much more pain was still ‘flying around’ out there…  Then shortly after the second plane hit the south tower, the company made the decision to close the office for the day and everyone went home…

It saddens me even more that the current administration has taken this tragedy and used it to chip away at the civil rights which are any citizen of this country’s birth right…  It saddens me the way they have used fear and intimidation to force people who disagreed with them to ‘change their tune’ or be dragged to the city square while being accused of ‘anti-patriotism’ the whole way…  I guess we should just be glad they didn’t want to ‘test’ them and make sure they weren’t witches by seeing if they ‘float’….

Part of being a patriot is having the courage to stand up to others, ESPECIALLY when those ‘others’ are using fear mongering and disinformation to rob EVERY American (and future generations of Americans) of the freedoms which we were guaranteed….

Now I know I’m a liberal, yeah SHOCKER right???…  But I’m also a Veteran, I just had the good fortune to have only had to TRAIN OBSESSIVELY for war and never face a deployment….   I trained for them, I was in a deployment ready combat unit, I took my chances I just lucked out…  If you call being discharged with an undiagnosed broken back (L4 vertebrae injury) and no disability pension lucky….

See even though I don’t always agree with the leadership chosen for this nation, I believe IN THIS NATION at least collectively…  I know that more than half of this country feels the way I do, it’s just too bad that I’m in the minority of that percentage in that I ALSO VOTE!!!!  See once you let them (them being politicians) vote away your rights, I can assure you they won’t be returning them “after the conflict is over”….  There is no end, ergo your rights will NEVER BE RETURNED once removed…

Everything has changed for me in 7 years, I have a new career, a new home, I’m in a new state and I’m working on my stand up…  I’m happier than I’ve ever been, but that’s due to my work and my wife’s work toward those goals, it had nothing to do with President Bush or his policies (or regarding domestic policies, LACK OF THEM)….

American citizens need to learn to be more vigilant and self protecting…  No one is ever going to be 100% safe, even with the current ‘my buddy’ governmental system which more resembles ‘big brother’ once you look past the surface….  You need to be more responsible for yourself and quit hoping for the ‘government’ to protect you, as that’s how they have been able to take advantage of the majority of you for the past 7 years…  By predicating your natural fears…

Remember the Victims of 9/11 NOT THE RHETORIC…  Remember that they all loved this country for what it made available to them before anything else….  Freedom.

John McCain is dying on the Cross for you America…

September 5, 2008, @ 2:44 pm 2 comments

Sarah Palin is a nit, as are her speech writers and teleprompter operators…  Learn to give a speech in front of a group if you… want….  to…. get…   on…  the stage…    Sorry we’re not all wearing antlers down here in the ‘lower 48’ sister…    We’re not all a member of the local Moose lodge…   Many of us are Elk or Eagles…  Even the occasional drunken Shriner….

I love how they (at the RNC) rip on the ‘set’ from Obama’s ‘show’ but they think we don’t notice the ‘subtle’ CROSS imagery when they put that big platform out there for McCain to give his speech from…   In all the long shots it looked just like he was standing on a giant cross…   All he needed was a couple nails through his hands and Mel Gibson beating the bejesus out of him and it would have been perfect

As he’s CRUICIFIED for our country…   Poor little McCain…     You know I had it worse, my mother was mentally unbalanced…    I was held prisoner for 17 YEARS…    He only did about 5 and a HALF…    Did the Viet Cong make him go get his own SWITCHES???…

I think not…

(I thought of this last night and luckily ‘The Jimmy Kimmel Show’ had the perfect clip I needed, enjoy)